Sunday, March 26, 2017

Things I know, things I don’t

I know more about you than anyone in the whole world.

I know how much you moved when you lived inside my body. I know how you liked to rest your hands while you nursed and I know the faces and sounds you make when you sleep. I know how to make you laugh. I know how to get you to leave the park without making you cry.

I know all your favorite books. I know some of them by heart. I know which blanket you like best and which lovey you’ll want to snuggle with when you’re sick. I know all your favorite songs. I know how you like your favorite foods cooked. I know which shirt you’re going to pick if it’s clean.

Sometimes you surprise me, and sometimes I know exactly what you’re about to see before you say it.

I know what I picture when I dream about your future. I know what kind of relationship I hope we have and I know the kind of life I hope I will have taught you to live and enjoy…

But there’s so much I don’t know.

I don’t know what will scare you, maybe so badly you struggle to sleep for years. I don’t know who will hurt you, who will crush your heart without a care in the world. I don’t know who you’ll marry or what struggles you might face. I don’t know, in this day and age, if you’ll find friends and a spouse who look at your face instead of their phones. I don’t know if you’ll stay close by or if you’ll do missionary work in a country I’ve never even heard of. I don’t know if you’ll have a smooth road or if you’ll hit some devastating bumps in life. I don’t know if you’ll basically follow the straight-and-narrow or if you’ll wind up in prison or rehab someday.

But I know that I love you. I know that I’m proud of you. I know that my future feels impossibly bright with you in it. I know that any hardships we face will be worth it. I know that nothing you can do will ever separate you from my love… and I know that God somehow loves you even more than I do.

And because of that, I know you’ll always be okay. 

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