The other day I had one of those horrifying moments where I realized with a bit of shock, this is my life.
This is. Right now. Today.
I’m living for the future again. Do you ever do that? Is this a problem I face all alone? I doubt it.
I’m getting so excited about our future home. I’m making my packing list for our upcoming road trip. I’m scouring my thrift store for books we’ll use in our homeschool future. I’m planning meals for next week, making a grocery list that will accommodate those meals. I’m packing away the clothes they outgrow so the next one can wear them when they hit that size.
But what about right now?
I don’t want to look back on my life and see that I was great at making lists and packing up totes of baby clothes. I want to look back and see that I took a lot of stroller walks and had a lot of great conversations. I want to have read a lot of great books and enjoyed lots of refreshing swims and to have kissed my husband too many times to count. I want to have hugged each of my children so many times that I can close my eyes and re-feel it when they grow up and move away. I want to sing songs even though I’m off-key, draw even though I’m nicht so gut, dance even though ain’t nobody trying to see that.
This is my life, today! I can’t plan ahead for those things and schedule them like appointments. I need to just DO THEM, NOW, WHILE I’M LIVING!